Just finished a bad project that weighed heavily in my yearly review and I am upset about it.
Just wrapped up a year at the firm I am in. It's been a rough year staffing wise but I am grateful I have a job.
I just came off my first actual project after a year on the beach. Leading up to the project I had some other internally chargeable work and some large proposals that I had received excellent feedback for.
However, this project was a little bit of a mess, I was essentially alone with the project manager on this project. With it being essentially my first real project and the project manager was from an entirely different department that did not do strategy work. It was a difficult situation to navigate. Plus I just did not connect with the manager, but work is work I try not to let it affect me.
While of course, I had a lack of experience and some mistakes that didn't help me. Project management was chaotic, there was no structure and I was thrown in the deep with no help and a very loosely defined scope (that I tried to clarify with the manager to no avail). I persevered nonetheless but things didn't turn out as well as I'd have liked.
My engagement review post project was not good, I made a lot of mistakes due to bad instructions, a lack of execution on my part, which I guess is normal since I was making the deck alone.. as a first project.
Now that I just had my yearly performance review, it was generally average but leaned more negative and really emphasized the latest review. It felt like no other good review was considered.
On the other hand, my managers say I am “very smart, curious, and have good industry knowledge, innovative etc etc” which is nice to hear, but it's not tied to being able to deliver with it so I feel it had no value.
How do I move forward? How do I tackle such situations in the future? Am I screwed?
I considered leaving the firm because I feel that my department is just not providing me with the learning experience I was hoping for. But on the other hand, a partner in an entirely different department seems to have a liking for me, as any proposal or anything I've done has been exclusively under him in one form or another. Even though technically I am not in his department. And he's giving me the opportunity to specialize in an industry I like so there's that.